Best Fishing Jokes

Before I became a boat Captain, I was a mate on another charter boat. If you fish you know that sometimes the fishing can be a little slow or it might take a while to find the fish. That’s when the kids onboard would start to get a little fidgety and bored. I had to learn to entertain them by telling them my fishing jokes.

You’re welcome to borrow these the next time you take your kids out fishing. I scoured the Internet looking for the best ones and in all honesty, I have no idea where they originated or to whom to give credit. Not all of them are fishing jokes but they’re worth keeping!

Short, One Line Jokes

So how does the Ocean say “Good Morning”?
It Waves! 

How does the Ocean say “Good Bye”?
“Sea Ya!”

When you’re on Cape Cod, someone steals your lunch, who do you call?
The Sandwich Police!

What is the favorite fish TV show?
Whale of Fortune!

My son asked me “Where does poo come from?”
I was a little uncomfortable but I gave him an honest explanation.
Then he looked a little perplexed and stared at me in stunned silence for
a few seconds, and then asked “And Tigger“?

Why won’t the lobster share his lunch?
Because he’s Shellfish!

How many fishermen does it take to change a light bulb?
One, but you should have seen the bulb – it was THIS big!

What do you call a fish with no eyes?
FSH…

Where did the fisherman go for his haircut?
The Bobber Shop

What do you call a fish that won’t shut up?
A big mouth bass!

Did you hear about the Fisherman who wore two jackets when he painted the house?
The instructions on the can said: “Put on two coats.”

Pet Fish Joke

A fisherman is walking on a Cape Cod beach carrying two Stripers in a bucket. A game warden walks up and asks to see his fishing license.

“I don’t have a fishing license,” says the guy.  “You know it’s illegal to fish without a license, right?” asks the warden.

“I wasn’t fishing, officer. These here Stripers are my pets.” “Your pets?”

“Yup. They like a little exercise, so when the weather’s nice, I take them down to the water and let them swim around. Once they’re done, I give them a whistle and they jump back into my bucket and we head home.”

The officer isn’t buying a word of it, so the guy says, “Don’t believe me? Watch!” and he throws the fish into the sea.

The warden waits for a minute then says, “Alright, now whistle to your fish and make them jump out of the water.”

The fisherman turns to the officer and says, “What fish?”

Until next time,  tight lines and smooth seas!

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